Le Voyage de Monsieur PerrichonPart 1 of 12

LE VOYAGE DE MONSIEUR PERRICHON

Produced by Charles Aldarondo, Tiffany Vergon, Anne Dreze

and the PG Online Distributed Proofreaders

THE JOURNEY OF MONSIEUR PERRICHON LE VOYAGE DE MONSIEUR PERRICHON

COMEDY IN FOUR ACTS COMÉDIE EN QUATRE ACTES

BY EUGÈNE LABICHE PAR EUGÈNE LABICHE

Of De The Académie Française L'Académie Française

AND ÉDOUARD MARTIN ET ÉDOUARD MARTIN

TO MY 1905 «EXTRA-FRENCH» CLASS

IN THE WILLIAM PENN CHARTER SCHOOL

INTRODUCTION

Because Le Voyage de M. Perrichon is a delightful comedy and particularly suitable for use in the class room, it does not follow that the place of its author in the literature of France should be unduly magnified.

Eugène Labiche's chief claim to fame is that, as a distinguished critic said of him, «for forty years he kept his contemporaries in laughter.» From 1838, when he wrote his first play, till 1876, when he voluntarily retired, he produced, generally in collaboration with writers known mainly through their association with him, over one hundred and fifty comedies, in each of which is heard the same dominant note of fun and merriment. But of these plays only a very small number possess the qualities that alone make for durability; neither their form—in most cases photographically true to the looseness of the most familiar conversation—nor their substance—often grotesquely impossible adventures, situations supremely laughable because colossally absurd—is calculated to embalm his plays against the ravages of time. He thought so himself, and declined for a long time to have them collected into a complete edition; and when, in 1880, he was proposed for a vacant seat in the Académie Française, he doubted whether he would have voted for his own admission into that illustrious company.

Thus Labiche must stand simply as the most prolific and genial of the fun-makers for France during almost half a century. This praise would have satisfied the modest man that he was. Born in Paris in 1815, he had been destined to the bar; but, preferring literature, early betook himself to the newspaper and the drama. Here he «found himself,» and from the age of twenty-three until he was over sixty filled the comic stage with his light and laughable productions. After his retirement in 1876 the distinctions that were bestowed upon him with no grudging hand brought him as much surprise as pleasure. His published Théâtre Complet was received by the public with altogether unexpected enthusiasm; he was elected to the Academy, and his speech on his reception into that body made a marked sensation. He died in 1888 at his country-place in Sologne, full of years and of wonder at the gratitude of his contemporaries for the amusement he had so long afforded them.

Had more of his comedies possessed the qualities of Le Voyage de M. Perrichon, this high esteem would not have been restricted to his contemporaries. For, underlying the humorous dialogue, there is in this work a shrewd observation, an analysis of character, that lift it far above mere farce. Its insight into the ungrateful heart of man,—a cheerful and reformative, not a gloomy or hopeless, insight,—its lifelike delineation of the parvenu, the self-made man who worships his maker, and who, because he has been successful in business, thinks all things are his, culture included: these raise Le Voyage de M. Perrichon to the plane of true comedy.

Like all Labiche's plays, this one deals with the middle-class, the bourgeois element in French life, where natural foibles are not varnished over with the gloss of education and conventionality, but appear in all their nakedness. M. Perrichon's self-complacency never once suspects itself; Majorin is mean «all over»; there is no external hindrance to the exhibition of the weakness within. The feminine characters, as is invariably the case in his répertoire, are but lightly sketched in. He claimed that «woman is no joke,» and got all his fun out of men. Only in the first Act are the peculiarities of Madame Perrichon at all brought out: the lack of refinement of her speech, her crustiness when her personal habits are interfered with, etc.; while Henriette is the typical passive young girl of French comedy, if not of French life, with no mind of her own, and a perfect readiness to accept any husband at her father's hand. But every one of the men is carefully and consistently drawn, from the fussy, pompous Perrichon to the well-meaning Jean. The susceptible Major offers the humorous contrast of his exquisitely smooth speech and manners with his uncompromising exaction of all that is due himself and his «beloved compatriot,» the French language. Armand and Daniel are both of them gentlemen and good fellows, yet they are most significantly distinguished: the former guileless, frank, simple, the latter artful and ingenious; and such they remain consistently from the opening to the closing scenes. The contest between them is an open, honorable one, and the equities are satisfied when simple straightforwardness wins out over worldly wisdom.

It may be noticed that nothing has here been said about Edouard Martin, whose name appears on the title-page with that of Labiche. It is generally agreed, and indeed obvious from internal evidence, that whatever aid Labiche may have received in the suggestion of plot, management of scenes, etc., from his many collaborators, the qualities that made his plays so uniformly successful are properly his own. Edouard Martin had produced a few light plays, now absolutely unknown, before his association with Labiche. With him he wrote not only Le Voyage de M. Perrichon, but also La Poudre aux Yeux, Les Vivacités du capitaine Tic, which have rescued his name from oblivion. He died in 1864, at the age of thirty-six.

As a text for class-room reading, Le Voyage de M. Perrichon can hardly be surpassed, where familiarity is sought with the vivacity of French conversation. The dialogue is throughout simply and frankly natural. It is, as ever in France, profusely sprinkled with expletives. These exclamations have a very definite force which no careful student of the language can afford to overlook. For convenience they have here been collected into a separate alphabetical list, where they can be readily referred to and reviewed.

As this play is easy reading and may well be taken up early in the study of French, the Notes are somewhat fuller than an advanced class would require. They are at some pains to prevent the missing of humorous points. They also endeavor to keep before the mind of the student the fact that a correct understanding of the text is not enough. He should strive to render the French into equivalent English idiom, as racy and as real as the original. In fact, he should not be satisfied until he has produced an «acting version.»

The Exercises for Composition, based upon very nearly each scene of the play, serve a twofold purpose. It too often happens that a word or an idiom is forgotten as soon as understood; to translate these Exercises the student must lift the French from the printed page and make it his own. Secondly, the English of the Exercises often throws additional light on the expressions that occur in the text, and thereby serves to secure for them a fuller, wider understanding.

Lastly, the Questions for Conversation, similarly founded on definite small portions of the comedy, will afford a measure of the real mastery that the student has acquired of the lesson for each day. Whether answered orally, or, as may very well be done, in writing, they will help him to «mobilize» his vocabulary, accidence, and syntax.

I.H.B. SPIERS. PHILADELPHIA, October, 1905.

CHARACTERS PERSONNAGES

PERRICHON PERRICHON THE COMMANDANT LE COMMANDANT MATHIEU MATHIEU MAJORIN MAJORIN ARMAND DESROCHES ARMAND DESROCHES DANIEL SAVARY DANIEL SAVARY JOSEPH, JOSEPH, the Commandant's servant domestique du Commandant JEAN, JEAN, Perrichon's servant domestique de Perrichon MADAME PERRICHON MADAME PERRICHON HENRIETTE, HENRIETTE, her daughter sa fille AN INNKEEPER UN AUBERGISTE A GUIDE UN GUIDE A RAILWAY EMPLOYEE UN EMPLOYÉ DU CHEMIN DE FER A PORTER UN FACTEUR PORTERS, TRAVELERS, ETC. COMMISSIONNAIRES, VOYAGEURS, ETC.

ACT ONE ACTE PREMIER

Lyon railway station, Gare du chemin de fer de Lyon, in Paris. à Paris. —At the back, —Au fond, facing, de face, a barrier opening onto the waiting rooms. barrière ouvrant sur les salles d'attente. At the back, to the right, Au fond, à droite, a ticket counter. guichet pour les billets. At the back, to the left, Au fond, à gauche, benches. bancs. To the right, A droite, a cake seller; marchande de gâteaux; to the left, à gauche, a book seller. marchande de livres.

SCENE ONE SCÈNE PREMIÈRE

MAJORIN, MAJORIN, A RAILWAY EMPLOYEE, UN EMPLOYÉ DU CHEMIN DE FER, A PORTER, UN FACTEUR, TRAVELERS, VOYAGEURS, PORTERS COMMISSIONNAIRES

Majorin, Majorin, pacing se promenant impatiently. avec impatience. —This Perrichon —Ce Perrichon is not arriving! n'arrive pas! It's been an hour that I'm waiting for him… Voilà une heure que je l'attends… It is indeed C'est pourtant bien today aujourd'hui that he must leave qu'il doit partir for Switzerland pour la Suisse with his wife and his daughter… avec sa femme et sa fille… (Bitterly.) (Avec amertume.) Carriage-makers Des carrossiers who go qui vont to Switzerland! en Suisse! Carriage-makers Des carrossiers who have qui ont forty thousand pounds of income! quarante mille livres de rentes! Carriage-makers Des carrossiers who have qui ont a carriage! voiture! What a century! Quel siècle! While I, Tandis que moi, I earn je gagne two thousand four hundred francs… deux mille quatre cents francs… a hardworking, intelligent employee, un employé laborieux, intelligent, always bent toujours courbé over his desk… sur son bureau… Today, Aujourd'hui, I asked j'ai demandé for a leave… un congé… I said that j'ai dit que I was j'étais on duty… de garde… I absolutely must see Il faut absolument que je voie Perrichon Perrichon before his departure… avant son départ… I want je veux to ask him le prier to advance me de m'avancer my quarter's pay… mon trimestre… six hundred six cents francs! francs! He will take Il va prendre his protective air… son air protecteur… act important! faire l'important! … a carriage-maker! … un carrossier! It's pitiful! ça fait pitié! He still isn't arriving! Il n'arrive toujours pas! one would say on dirait he's doing it on purpose! qu'il le fait exprès! (Addressing (S'adressant à a porter un facteur who passes qui passe followed by travelers.) suivi de voyageurs.) Monsieur… Monsieur… at what time does à quelle heure the direct train for Lyon depart? part le train direct pour Lyon?

THE PORTER, LE FACTEUR, abruptly.— brusquement.— Ask the employee, Demandez à l'employé, (He exits (Il sort by the left.) par la gauche.)

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— Thank you… Merci… boor! manant! (Addressing (S'adressant à the employee l'employé who is near the counter.) qui est près du guichet.) Monsieur, Monsieur, at what time does à quelle heure the direct train for Lyon depart? part le train direct pour Lyon?

THE EMPLOYEE, L'EMPLOYÉ, abruptly.— brusquement.— That does not concern me! Ça ne me regarde pas! see voyez the poster. l'affiche. (He points to (Il désigne a poster une affiche offstage, à la cantonade, to the left.) à gauche.)

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— Thank you… Merci… (Aside.) (A part.) They are polite Ils sont polis in these administrations! dans ces administrations! If ever Si jamais you come tu viens to my office, à mon bureau, you! toi! … Let's see … Voyons the poster… l'affiche… (He exits (Il sort to the left.) à gauche.)

ACT I, SCENE II ACTE I, SCÈNE II

THE EMPLOYEE, L'EMPLOYÉ, PERRICHON, PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, HENRIETTE HENRIETTE

They enter Ils entrent from the right de la droite

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— This way! Par ici! … let's not leave each other! … ne nous quittons pas! we would no longer nous ne pourrions plus be able to find each other… nous retrouver… Where is Où sont our luggage? nos bagages? … (Looking … (Regardant to the right; à droite; offstage.) à la cantonade.) Ah! Ah! very good! très bien! Who has Qui est-ce qui a the umbrellas? les parapluies?

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— Me, papa. Moi, papa.

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— And the overnight bag? Et le sac de nuit? … the coats? … les manteaux?

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Here they are! Les voici!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— And my panama? Et mon panama? … … It stayed Il est resté in the cab! dans le fiacre! (Making a movement (Faisant un mouvement to exit pour sortir and stopping.) et s'arrêtant.) Ah! Ah! no! non! I have it je l'ai in my hand! à la main! … God, … Dieu, I'm hot! que j'ai chaud!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— It's your fault! C'est ta faute! … … you rush us, tu nous presses, you jostle us! tu nous bouscules! … … I don't like je n'aime pas to travel like that! à voyager comme ça!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— It's the departure C'est le départ that is laborious: qui est laborieux: once une fois que we are settled! nous serons casés! … … Stay there, Restez là, I'm going to get je vais prendre the tickets… les billets… (Giving (Donnant his hat son chapeau to Henriette.) à Henriette.) Here, Tiens, keep garde-moi my panama… mon panama… (At the counter.) (Au guichet.) Three Trois first-class premières for Lyon? pour Lyon?

THE EMPLOYEE, L'EMPLOYÉ, abruptly.— brusquement.— It's not open! Ce n'est pas ouvert! In a quarter of an hour! Dans un quart d'heure!

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, to the employee.— à l'employé.— Ah! Ah! pardon! pardon! it's the first time I travel… c'est la première fois que je voyage… (Returning (Revenant to his wife.) à sa femme.) We are Nous sommes early. en avance.

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— There! Là! when I told you we had time… quand je te disais que nous avions le temps… You didn't let us Tu ne nous as pas laissé have lunch! déjeuner!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— It is better Il vaut mieux to be early! être en avance! … … one examines on examine the station! la gare! (To Henriette.) (A Henriette.) Well! Eh bien! little girl, petite fille, are you es-tu happy? contente? … … Here we are, off! Nous voilà partis! … … a few more minutes, encore quelques minutes, and, et, swift as rapides comme William Tell's arrow, la flèche de Guillaume Tell, we shall dart nous nous élancerons towards the Alps! vers les Alpes! (To his wife.) (A sa femme.) You Tu have taken as pris the opera-glasses? la lorgnette?

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— But yes! Mais oui!

HENRIETTE, HENRIETTE, to her father.— à son père.— No offense, Sans reproches, it has been at least two years that voilà au moins deux ans que you have promised us tu nous promets this trip. ce voyage.

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— My daughter, Ma fille, it was necessary il fallait that I had sold que j'eusse vendu my business… mon fonds… A merchant Un commerçant does not retire ne se retire pas as easily aussi facilement from affairs des affaires as a little girl qu'une petite fille from her boarding school… de son pensionnat… Besides, D'ailleurs, I was waiting j'attendais for your education to be finished que ton éducation fût terminée to complete it pour la compléter by making radiate en faisant rayonner before you devant toi the grand spectacle le grand spectacle of nature! de la nature!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Oh, come on! Ah ça! are you going to est-ce que vous allez continue continuer like that? comme ça?

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— What? Quoi?

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— You are making speeches Vous faites des phrases in a station! dans une gare!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— I am not making Je ne fais pas speeches… de phrases… I am elevating j'élève the child's ideas. les idées de l'enfant. (Pulling a small notebook from his pocket.) (Tirant de sa poche un petit carnet.) Here, Tiens, my daughter, ma fille, here is voici a notebook un carnet that que I bought j'ai acheté for you. pour toi.

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— For what purpose? Pour quoi faire?

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— To write Pour écrire on one side d'un côté the expense la dépense and on the other et de l'autre the impressions. les impressions.

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— What impressions? Quelles impressions?

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Our travel impressions! Nos impressions de voyage! You will write, Tu écriras, and I et moi will dictate. je dicterai.

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— What! Comment! are you going to become vous allez vous faire an author auteur now? à présent?

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— It is not about Il ne s'agit pas de making myself an author… me faire auteur… but it seems to me mais il me semble that a man of the world qu'un homme du monde can have peut avoir thoughts des pensées and collect them et les recueillir in a notebook! sur un carnet!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— That will be Ce sera very pretty! bien joli!

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, aside.— à part.— She Elle is est like that comme ça every time chaque fois she qu'elle has not had n'a pas pris her coffee! son café!

A PORTER, UN FACTEUR, pushing poussant a small cart un petit chariot loaded with luggage.— chargé de bagages.— Monsieur, Monsieur, here are voici your bags. vos bagages. Do you want Voulez-vous to check them? les faire enregistrer?

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Certainly! Certainement! But first, Mais avant, I je am going to count vais them… les compter… because, parce que, when one knows one's count… quand on sait son compte… One, Un, two, deux, three, trois, four, quatre, five, cinq, six, six, my wife, ma femme, seven, sept, my daughter, ma fille, eight, huit, and I, et moi, nine. neuf. We are Nous sommes nine. neuf.

THE PORTER.— LE FACTEUR.— Take them away! Enlevez!

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, running courant towards the back.— vers le fond.— Let's hurry! Dépêchons-nous!

THE PORTER.— LE FACTEUR.— Not Pas that way, par là, it's c'est this way! par ici! (He indicates (Il indique left.) la gauche.)

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Ah! Ah! very good! très bien! (To the women.) (Aux femmes.) Wait for me there! Attendez-moi là! … … let's not get lost! ne nous perdons pas! (He (Il exits running, sort en courant, following suivant the porter.) le facteur.)

ACT I, SCENE III ACTE I, SCÈNE III

MADAME PERRICHON, HENRIETTE, then DANIEL MADAME PERRICHON, HENRIETTE, puis DANIEL

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— Poor father! Pauvre père! what trouble quelle peine he il gives himself! se donne!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— He is Il est like comme a dazed man! un ahuri!

DANIEL, DANIEL, entering entrant followed suivi by a porter d'un commissionnaire carrying his trunk.—I do not yet know qui porte sa malle.—Je ne sais pas encore where où I am going, je vais, wait! attendez! (Catching sight of Henriette.) (Apersevant Henriette.) It is C'est she! elle! I was not mistaken! je ne me suis pas trompé! (He greets (Il salue Henriette Henriette who qui returns his greeting.) lui rend son salut.)

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, to her daughter.— à sa fille.— Who is Quel est this gentleman? ce monsieur?

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— It is C'est a young man un jeune homme who qui made me dance m'a fait danser last week la semaine dernière at the ball au bal of the Town Hall de la Mairie of the eighth arrondissement. du huitième arrondissement.

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, quickly.— vivement.— A dancer! Un danseur! (She greets (Elle salue Daniel.) Daniel.)

DANIEL.— DANIEL.— Madame! Madame! … … Mademoiselle! mademoiselle! … … I bless chance… je bénis le hasard… These ladies Ces dames are going to leave?… vont partir?…

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Yes, monsieur! Oui, monsieur!

DANIEL.— DANIEL.— These ladies Ces dames are going to Marseille, vont à Marseille, no doubt?… sans doute?…

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— No, monsieur. Non, monsieur.

DANIEL.— DANIEL.— To Nice, A Nice, perhaps?… peut-être?…

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— No, monsieur! Non, monsieur!

DANIEL.— DANIEL.— Pardon, madame… Pardon, madame… I thought… je croyais… If Si my services… mes services…

THE PORTER, LE FACTEUR, to Daniel.— à Daniel.— Bourgeois! Bourgeois! you only have time vous n'avez que le temps for pour your luggage. vos bagages.

DANIEL.— DANIEL.— That's right! C'est juste! let's go! allons! (Aside.) (A part.) I would have liked to know J'aurais voulu savoir where où they are going… elles vont… before avant de taking prendre my ticket… mon billet… (Greeting.) (Saluant.) Madame… Madame… Mademoiselle… mademoiselle… (Aside.) (A part.) They are leaving, Elles partent, that is c'est the main thing! le principal! (He exits (Il sort by the left.) par la gauche.)

ACT I, ACTE I, SCENE IV SCÈNE IV

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, HENRIETTE, HENRIETTE, then puis ARMAND ARMAND

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— He is Il est very good, très bien, this ce young man! jeune homme!

ARMAND, ARMAND, holding tenant an overnight bag.— un sac de nuit.— Take Portez my ma trunk malle to the luggage… aux bagages… I je will join you! vous rejoins! (Catching sight of (Apercevant Henriette.) Henriette.) It is C'est she! elle! (They greet each other.) (Ils se saluent.)

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Who is Quel est this gentleman? ce monsieur?

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— It is C'est another young man encore un jeune homme who qui made me dance m'a fait danser at the ball au bal of the eighth arrondissement. du huitième arrondissement.

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Oh, come on! Ah ça! they ils have all made an appointment here then? se sont donc tous donné rendez-vous ici? … no matter, … n'importe, he is c'est a dancer! un danseur! (Greeting.) (Saluant.) Monsieur… Monsieur…

ARMAND.— ARMAND.— Madame… Madame… Mademoiselle… mademoiselle… I je bless bénis chance… le hasard… These ladies Ces dames are going to leave?… vont partir?…

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Yes, monsieur. Oui, monsieur.

ARMAND.— ARMAND.— These ladies Ces dames are going to Marseille, vont à Marseille, no doubt?… sans doute?…

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— No, monsieur. Non, monsieur.

ARMAND.— ARMAND.— To Nice, A Nice, perhaps?… peut-être?…

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, aside.— à part.— Well, Tiens, like comme the other one! l'autre! (Aloud.) (Haut.) No, monsieur! Non, monsieur!

ARMAND.— ARMAND.— Pardon, madame, Pardon, madame, I je thought… croyais… If Si my services… mes services…

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, aside.— à part.— After that, Après ça, they ils are sont from the same du même district. arrondissement.

ARMAND, ARMAND, aside.— à part.— I am no further along… Je ne suis pas plus avancé… I will go Je vais faire check enregistrer my trunk… ma malle… I je will return! reviendrai! (Bowing.) (Saluant.) Madame… Madame… Mademoiselle… mademoiselle…

ACT I, ACTE I, SCENE V SCÈNE V

MADAME PERRICHON, MADAME PERRICHON, HENRIETTE, HENRIETTE, MAJORIN, MAJORIN, then puis PERRICHON PERRICHON

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— He is very good, Il est très bien, this ce young man! jeune homme! … But … Mais what is your father doing? que fait ton père? my legs are going back into my body! les jambes me rentrent dans le corps!

MAJORIN, MAJORIN, entering from the left.— entrant de la gauche.— I was mistaken, Je me sais trompé, this train ce train only leaves ne part que in an hour! dans une heure!

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— Look! Tiens! Monsieur monsieur Majorin! Majorin!

MAJORIN, MAJORIN, aside.— à part.— Finally! Enfin! here they are! les voila!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— You! Vous! how comment are you not n'êtes-vous pas at your office? à votre bureau?

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— I asked J'ai demandé for leave, un congé, fair lady; belle dame; I je did not want ne voulais pas to let you leave vous laisser partir without sans bidding you farewell! vous faire mes adieux!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— What! Comment! it is for that c'est pour cela that you came! que vous êtes venu! Ah! Ah! how kind that is! que c'est aimable!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— But Mais I do not see je ne vois pas Perrichon? Perrichon?

HENRIETTE.— HENRIETTE.— Papa Papa is taking care of the luggage. s'occupe des bagages.

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, entering entrant running, en courant, offstage.— à la cantonade.— The tickets Les billets first! d'abord! very good! très bien!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— Ah! Ah! here he is! le voici! Good day, Bonjour, dear friend! cher ami!

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, very rushed.— très pressé.— Ah! Ah! it's c'est you! toi! you are tu es very kind bien gentil to have come! d'être venu! … Pardon, … Pardon, I must take il faut que je prenne my tickets! mes billets! (He leaves him.) (Il le quitte.)

MAJORIN, MAJORIN, aside.— à part.— He is polite! Il est poli!

PERRICHON, PERRICHON, to the clerk à l'employé at the counter.— au guichet.— Monsieur, Monsieur, they do not want on ne veut pas to check enregistrer my luggage mes bagages before avant que I have taken je n'aie pris my tickets! mes billets!

THE CLERK.— L'EMPLOYÉ.— It is not open! Ce n'est pas ouvert! wait! attendez!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Wait! Attendez! and et over there là-bas they told me: ils m'ont dit: Hurry up! Dépêchez-vous! (Wiping his forehead.) (S'essuyant le front.) I am Je suis in a sweat! en nage!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— And I, Et moi, I can no longer stand on my legs! je ne tiens plus sur mes jambes!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Well, Eh bien, sit down! asseyez-vous! (Indicating the back to the left.) (Indiquant le fond à gauche.) There are Voilà benches… des bancs… you are vous êtes good bonnes to remain de rester standing there plantées là like comme two deux sentinels! factionnaires!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— It is C'est you yourself toi-même who qui told us: nous as dit: Stay there! Restez-là! You never finish! Tu n'en finis pas! You Tu are es unbearable! insupportable!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Come on, Voyons, Caroline! Caroline!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Your Ton trip! voyage! I have already had enough of it! j'en ai déjà assez!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— One can clearly see On voit bien that que you have not had tu n'as pas pris your coffee! ton café! Here, Tiens, go va sit down! t'asseoir!

MADAME PERRICHON.— MADAME PERRICHON.— Yes! Oui! but mais hurry up! dépêche-toi! (She (Elle goes to sit down va s'asseoir with Henriette.) avec Henriette.)

ACT I, SCENE VI ACTE I, SCÈNE VI

PERRICHON, MAJORIN

MAJORIN, aside.— MAJORIN, à part.— Pretty little household! Joli petit ménage!

PERRICHON, to Majorin.— PERRICHON, à Majorin.— It is always like that C'est toujours comme ça when quand she has not had elle n'a pas pris her coffee… son café… This good Majorin! Ce bon Majorin! it is very kind c'est bien gentil of you à toi to have come! d'être venu!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— Yes, Oui, I wanted je voulais to speak to you te parler about a small matter. d'une petite affaire.

PERRICHON, distracted.— PERRICHON, distrait.— And Et my mes luggage bagages which qui remained sont restés over there là-bas on sur a une table! table! … … I am Je suis worried! inquiet! (Aloud.) (Haut.) This Ce good bon Majorin! Majorin! it is c'est very bien kind gentil of you à toi to have d'être come! venu! … … (Aside.) (A part.) If Si I went there! j'y allais!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— I have J'ai a un small petit favor service to ask of you. à te demander.

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Of me? A moi?

MAJORIN.—I have moved… MAJORIN.—J'ai déménagé… and if et si you would tu voulais advance me m'avancer a quarter un trimestre of de my mes salary… appointements… six six hundred cents francs… francs…

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— What! Comment! here? ici?

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— I Je believe crois I have always returned to you, t'avoir toujours rendu, exactly exactement the money you lent me. l'argent que tu m'as prêté.

PERRICHON,— PERRICHON,— It is not about that! Il ne s'agit pas de ça!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— Pardon! Pardon! I je wish to tiens à state it… le constater… I receive Je touche my dividend mon dividende from the des steamships paquebots on the le eighth huit of next month; du mois prochain; I have j'ai twelve douze shares… actions… and if et si you tu do not n'as pas trust confiance me, en moi, I je will give you te remettrai the titles les titres as guarantee. en garantie.

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Come on! Allons donc! are you es-tu stupid! bête!

MAJORIN, dryly.— MAJORIN, sèchement.— Thank you! Merci!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— Why Pourquoi the devil diable also aussi do you come viens-tu to ask me that me demander ça at the moment au moment où I am leaving? je pars? … … I have taken j'ai pris just juste the money necessary l'argent nécessaire for my trip. à mon voyage.

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— After all, Après tout, if si it bothers you… ça te gêne… let's not speak of it anymore. n'en parlons plus. I Je will address myself m'adresserai to usurers à des usuriers who qui will take me prendront five percent per year from me… cinq pour cent par an… I je will not die from it! n'en mourrai pas!

PERRICHON, pulling out his wallet.—Come on, PERRICHON, tirant son portefeuille.—Voyons, do not get angry! ne te fâche pas! … here, … tiens, there are les voilà your six hundred francs, tes six cents francs, but mais do not speak of it n'en parle pas to my wife. à ma femme.

MAJORIN, taking the notes.—I understand! MAJORIN, prenant les billets.—Je comprends! she is so avaricious! elle est si avare!

PERRICHON.—What, PERRICHON.—Comment, avaricious! avare!

MAJORIN.— MAJORIN.— I mean Je veux dire that she has qu'elle a order! de l'ordre!

PERRICHON.— PERRICHON.— That is necessary, Il faut ça, my friend! mon ami! … … that is necessary! il faut ça!

MAJORIN, dryly.— MAJORIN, sèchement.— Come on! Allons! it is c'est six hundred francs six cents francs that I owe you… que je te dois… farewell! adieu! (Aside.) (A part.) What a fuss! Que d'histoires! for pour six hundred francs! six cents francs! … … and that one goes to Switzerland! et ça va en Suisse! … Carriage-maker! … Carrossier! (He disappears to the right.) (Il disparaît à droite.)

PERRICHON.—Well, PERRICHON.—Eh bien, he leaves? il part? he il did not even say thank you to me! ne m'a seulement pas dit merci! but mais deep down, au fond, I believe je crois he loves me! qu'il m'aime! (Perceiving (Apercevant the ticket window open.) le guichet ouvert.) Ah! Ah! Zounds! sapristi! tickets are being distributed! on distribue les billets! … (He rushes … (Il se précipite towards the railing vers la balustrade and jostles et bouscule five or six people cinq ou six personnes who are queuing.) qui font la queue.)